From My Story / My Heart to Yours…..New Life….Chapter 1

Oh Gosh where to even begin. I realize I have not posted since I was last posting about pregnancy updates. Well….I have since had my baby girl. She will be 3 years in two months!!! Crazy how time flies after you have a child. Literally your world is turned upside down, and I mean that in the best way possible. Miss Avery Faye, has not only provided my life with the greatest joy possible and given me the deepest purpose and sense of accomplishment, but she saved my life. LITERALLY. So I have returned to the platform of writing and trust me when I say…I am no blogger. But I…just like each and every one of you have a story. I enjoy writing, as I find it extremely therapeutic, but I truly….and I say this from the deepest part of my soul….love helping people. And if through writing in telling my story I can help just one person…then hey, that is a WIN.

So over the course of the next few months I will be writing content more so targeted to #women. I believe that women are the strongest creatures on this planet earth. We CAN and DO do it all. I am not going on a crazy rant / soap box / or leading any sort of woman campaigns by any means, but I do want through my voice, yours to be heard. You are not alone. I have been through what you are going through and vice versa. We can somehow always relate at some capacity. Why? Because we are women. We are compassionate and caring. We have a deep sense of intuition and empathy. Anyway….stay tuned. Would like to inform you all of what I Have been up to the past three years. I think you might find it quite intriguing. I will go in detail of “My story”, just like you have a story. From childhood to now a single mommy. From my struggles with an eating disorder. An absentee father. A marriage to the birth of my first child. To the divorce straight to dating a psychopath. Starting a new business and everything in between.

What I have learned this past month

This is what I have learned from the delivery of my first child through the entire first month of accommodating to the new life. These may not be true for all, but they certainly worked for us.

Delivery: Even though your water breaks, you may not even be dilated. I was dilated to a 2 when I arrived to he hospital at 8am and was in labor until 10pm
Trust in your delivery team. They truly know what is best. I ended up getting an epidural the same time as they started to induce me at 11am. When they turned the pitocin up..the baby’s heart beat went up. She didn’t like it. So they had to keep it at a mild induction. Hence, very long labor.
St lukes east is a tremendous hospital to deliver. Every nurse was very kind and attentive.
C section is a major surgery – be prepared to not be able to walk for a couple of days. I remember that first time stepping down out of the hospital bed. I could not even stand up straight and had to lean on my husband. Walking was out of the question. I had to barely shuffle step by step. Sitting down on the toilet was even harder. I guess I just didn’t realize how major the surgery was.
Utilize the nursery while you’re in the hospital. They won’t be around when you get home at 2, 3, and 4am
Bring minimal items to the hospital. I literally stayed in one pair of pj’s the entire time.
A warm and Cozy robe is a must have. Also warm cozy socks.

Take everything you can from the hospital. Of course all the baby things..the snot sucker…baby beanie, hair brush, etc. But also take and ask for more pads as well as women panties for recovery. I used so many of those.

When you get baby home…
You will not be sleeping more than 3 hours at a time. You will be very sleep deprived but you will adjust.
You will learn what works best. For instance..joe will feed twice at night (9 or 10pm and 12 or 1am) and I take the Entire morning shift since he has to go to work at 6am.
You must get out at least once a day when you can actually drive. If you don’t, then you will get major cabin fever. You must remember to take care of yourself in order to care for another.
You will get frustrated! You will argue with your partner! You are basically fighting over who is more deserving of sleep. Ha then you will be fighting over dumb dumb things because you are so sleep deprived that you just want to argue. I look back and some of the things we argued over are hysterical.
Admit when you’re wrong and always remember to respect one another. This is key. Your relationship will be tested but don’t say things that will be remembered and hurtful.

This is a huge adjustment..and will take some time getting used to.
You have a new life that solely relies on you for their every need. That is a lot of pressure for new parents

Don’t introduce bottle too soon or could confuse baby and they refuse to breastfeed. Reason is bottle feeding is easier for baby. Milk comes out more and quicker therefor they get lazy and don’t want to suckle at the breast.

Encourage your partner to have a diaper party prior to baby’s arrival. You will go through so many of those darn things.

Baby wipes make really good make up remover pads. Inexpensive and effective.

Dreft is the best smelling laundry detergent that just smells like a little newborn baby’s skin

Get all the help you can. When people offer to come over..say yes. Always ask for them to bring food. You will not feel like cooking for at least a couple weeks. Your appetite will be low due to the pain meds but remember to eat. So important if you are breastfeeding

You…again will not be getting much sleep so rest when baby is sleeping. You have to nap when people come over. Though it may be hard. Your baby will be ok. Always make people use hand sanitizer before holding baby. If anyone is or has been sick..this could put the baby in icu since their little immune systems aren’t working just yet.

Invest in the happiest baby on the block dvd. Such a life saver. The 5 s’s are key. Joe really got the swaddle down. I mean she looks like a little cacooon all wrapped up. Also sleep sacs are good to. These make it to where baby cannot move their arms which is so important in that first month. They are so immature and need to feel like still in the womb.

Must haves:
Rocking/glider chair
Bassinet with rollers
Breast pump – may seem daunting at first but so key to have
Hands free pumping bra
Swaddle blankets/ swaddle sacs
Chico key fit car seat and snap stroller
Car seat cover / canopy
10 sets of plain white onesies
Allocated changing area
Butt paste
Ton of diapers

I have tried multiple swings and baby carriers. Really have yet to find one she loves.

Avery was born in the heart of winter so if you are going to have visitors, make sure they have gotten their tdap shots and have not been sick in past month. Or have not been around sick people. Also, they must always sanitize before holding baby. Minimal sickness to adults can send a newborn to icu for days. Not good to risk it.

It will go by so fast. I brought Avery home from the hospital and she barely weighed 6lb. She now weighs 8lb 12oz at one month. She is growing so fast and I realize what everyone says is these times will fly by.

She is the most precious beautiful healthy baby and we are so blessed. Blessed beyond belief on the miracle we created and I wouldn’t trade the responsibility of her for anything in this world. It truly is phenonenal in knowing you love something way beyond yourself and would do anything to protect and keep them safe.

Pregnancy update : 35 weeks

How far along? 35 Weeks

Total weight gain: 16 lbs.

Maternity clothes: yes. Wearing them quite frequently. Joe bought me some maternity tights that go up over my belly that I absolutely love. I also really like the maternity shirts that come down long over tights that show my belly. They need to be tight though. Anything that is loose, just doesn’t look right.

Stretch marks: None yet. I use baby oil every shower with aloe and vitamin E. I also moisturize after the shower as well. If I don’t, then I become itchy. Which is the absolute worst thing a pregnant woman in their third trimester can be going through.

Sleep: Well since I have gained the most weight in this trimester and she is growing rapidly, there is absolutely no way I can sleep on my tummy. Before I was trying to sneak in a side lay on tummy to fall asleep, but oh noo…there is absolutely no way I could do that now. She is way too big and it is way too uncomfortable. Anytime I am laying down, I need to have my full body pillow to put in between my legs. I lay on my right side a lot. They say the better side is the left to provide the baby with more circulation but it is hard because joe and Reese’s are on that side and it is hard to put body pillow in the middle of the bed. Plus I am more comfortable on my right. This past couple weeks, I was having terrible indigestion that led to acid reflux. I would wake up in the middle of the night experiencing that. So disgusting and terrible. It could be really scary to some people because you can choke on that! So anyhow, she put me on a prescription that decreases the amount of acid my stomach produces. It has helped immensely. Another thing…I can’t just jump out of bed anymore. Ha no way. Those days are over. I can’t even sit up on my own. I have to do this little roll off the side move. Ha it’s actually pretty comical. And I do frequently get up in the middle of the night to pee. I average about 3 times per night. So when I wake up, I chug a very cold 1L bottle of water that I put in there the night before.

Best moment of this week: Christmas was very nice. Also my sister brought over her mini crib for us so little Avery’s nursery is starting to look like a nursery. We pretty much have everything we need at this point.

Miss anything: I miss my skin that once glowed and laying on my stomach! That is really it though. I am so close to the finish line and really have not had a bad pregnancy. This last trimester has been the most growth with the baby but the most uncomfortable, which I really expected. I am starting to waddle a bit too. Hahah

Movement: oh she moves all the time! Literally feels like a little alien in there. The other day she kicked so hard that my laptop I had resting on my belly, shot straight up. Reese’s can feel her moving in there too when she is testing her head on my belly.

Food cravings: nothing new at this point. I was craving seafood a couple weeks ago but got that fix in. I still eat my peanut butter raisin toast with my vitamins every morning.

Anything making you queasy or sick: obese people. I really can’t stand looking at them while I a eating. The other day I was in ihop eating breakfast by myself and it grossed me out so badly that I couldn’t finish my meal.

Have you started to show yet: Oh gosh yes. I measure in at 34 cm and people are frequently asking when I am due.

Gender: Little baby girl.

Labor signs: I have had the ligament pain and one dat this past couple weeks I was cramping all day. I knew it wasn’t labor but prepping me on the pain associated with contractions. It knocked me out an entire day.

Belly button in or out: All the way out baby.

Wedding rings on or off: On

Happy or moody most of the time: Tired, sick feeling lately.

Looking forward to: my baby shower ok January 10th!!! And seeing our baby girl for the first time.

Pregnancy Update 30 Weeks

How far along? 30 Weeks

Total weight gain: 6 lbs.

Maternity clothes: I have really resorted to tights. And it just so happens to be the perfect time of year for long sweaters, tights, and boots. Having fun with the fashion.

Stretch marks: No

Sleep: This trimester has officially been the hardest. I am very uncomfortable sleeping on my stomach and find it hard to sleep any other way. I have also been the most tired these past couple of weeks, which makes sleep imperative. I can feel her moving around when I am on my tummy which I really am not a fan of. It’s almost like it mentally messes wth me. Like I’m smooshing her. So I’ve found this way to slightly turn my body allowing the ability to not fully be on my stomach.

Best moment of this week: We got all of our Christmas shopping done. Also, thanksgiving was the best day ever. We went to my moms at 1pm and were there until 530pm. Then went to joes parents. It was just a special day to be with family all day. Lots of laughter and love. Each prayer included baby avery and welcoming her to the family.

Miss anything: I miss not being able to sleep comfortably. I miss not having heart burn! I have heart burn all the time now. My ankles are frequently swollen. My skin is not as glowing as it once was. She is sucking the life out of me in this trimester.

Movement: still lots of movement. She really is active at night when I’m just laying there on the couch.

Food cravings: Orange juice. Cinnamon raisin toast with peanut butter. Chocolate milk.

Anything making you queasy or sick: thinking of labor / delivery.

Have you started to show yet: Yes. Though, my last ultrasound revealed my belly measurement is not where it needs to be. I should be measuring the cm equivalent to how far along I am in pregnancy. I should be measuring 30 cm but only measuring 25 cm. so they had to order an ultrasound. She is measuring just fine and considered in 60 percentile. I do have a long torso so she may just be sitting a certain way.

Gender: Little baby girl.

Labor signs: Just lots of cramps after exercise, but nothing too crazy. Apparently that is just her growing.

Belly button in or out: Belly button is starting to come out. Not all the way there yet, but close.

Wedding rings on or off: On

Happy or moody most of the time: Tired, sick feeling lately.

Looking forward to: getting bigger. I am still not showing that much and I want to be!! And heart burn subsiding even just a tad bit.

I also had to get a root canal this week which was terrible!!! Not only am I already feeling slightly sick…I can’t sleep…I have terrible heart burn…but now I have to get a root canal. And this root canal was different. The tooth was so infected that the tooth was mobile. The dentist could not do the procedure in one sitting. It has been rough. I want to be back to normal health and baby to be normal size. image

Pregnancy Update: 26 Weeks

How far along? 26 Weeks

Total weight gain: 4 lbs.

Maternity clothes: I have really resorted to tights. And it just so happens to be the perfect time of year for long sweaters, tights, and boots. Having fun with the fashion.

Stretch marks: No

Sleep: We just recently got a new mattress and I cannot get enough sleep. We also just had the “fall back” time change, so getting acclimated to that.

Best moment of this week: we went to one of Joe’s friends birthday/Halloween parties and it was fun to get to mingle with other pregnant women. Also, last week…went to one of my good friends baby showers that I grew up with. It is very reassuring / comforting to have friends in the same place in life.

Miss anything: I really don’t. I am fully embracing what is about to come with open arms. There is nothing I could be potentially missing NOW, to negate what amazing-ness is about to happen!!

Movement: She is doing Olympics in there. Really after I eat and I have noticed after I exercise, i have cramps. Which means she is growing.

Food cravings: Meat! Cheese! Anything, everything. I do get full pretty fast though.

Anything making you queasy or sick: The car, confined spaces, strong perfume and I am hyper-sensitive to cigarette smoke! Yuck!

Have you started to show yet: Yes. I am also wearing little belts to show off the bump!

Gender: Little baby girl.

Labor signs: Just lots of cramps after exercise, but nothing too crazy. Apparently that is just her growing.

Belly button in or out: Belly button is starting to come out. Not all the way there yet, but close.

Wedding rings on or off: On

Happy or moody most of the time: Very happy. 🙂

Looking forward to: getting bigger. I am still not showing that much and I want to be!!

Pregnancy Update: 22 Weeks

How far along? 22 Weeks

Total weight gain: 4 lbs.

Maternity clothes: I have a few, but not too many. Not showing that much still.

Stretch marks: Nope

Sleep: This past week it has really became uncomfortable to sleep on my tummy. So I have been alternating sides and incorporated my body pillow.

Best moment of this week: to really feel her!! she is very active in there and it is not just flutters I feel anymore. I can feel her move around. It is so cool. I just lay there and feel her move and it just makes me smile.

Miss anything: I miss not being able to drink wine or beer. Our KC sports team are killing it right now. Royals are in post season and just swept the Angels, Chiefs are doing great under Andy Reid’s leadership, and Mizzou is climbing the ranks in the SEC. It has been hard for me not to be able to drink. I also have really started to cramp recently. That hurts.

Movement: A lot of movement this past week. She is super active in there. Very active in the morning, after I eat, and at night.

Food cravings: Sour candy…All day, every day.

Anything making you queasy or sick: strong perfume and I am hyper-sensitive to cigarette smoke! Yuck!

Have you started to show yet: I have. However, people still cannot tell, so not that much.

Gender: IT’S A GIRL!!

Labor signs: Just lots of cramps yesterday, but nothing too crazy. Apparently that is just her growing.

Belly button in or out: In

Wedding rings on or off: On

Happy or moody most of the time: Happy 🙂 Slight anxiety and stress at times for the anticipation.

Looking forward to: decorating her nursery and eventually having a baby shower!

Pregnancy Update: 19 Weeks

How far along? 19 weeks 4 days

Total weight gain: I currently weigh 123, so have gained 4 lbs in the pregnancy so far.

Maternity clothes: my soon to be sister in Law sent me all of her old maternity clothes this past week! I am so thankful for her paying it forward. Though, I am still wearing my same jeans and fit into everything. Granted they are a little snug. When I get home after work I immediately throw on my “comfies”.

Stretch marks: Nope

Sleep: I still sleep on my tummy!! My doctor said it was fine until I physically cannot sleep on it anymore. I am starting to sleep on my sides a little more frequently. Just weird because in order for me to fall asleep, I have to be on my tummy.

Best moment of this week: I was driving into work and jamming out as usual. I was listening to Fleetwood Mac-Chain and what do I feel for the first time….little flutteries to the beat. It was so very special. And now I know my little bun cooking in there will enjoy music. 🙂

Miss anything: Not really, my appetite is back…thank goodness!

Movement: Nothing physical that I can see, but slight flutters.

Food cravings: Sour candy…All day, every day.

Anything making you queasy or sick: strong perfume and I am hyper-sensitive to cigarette smoke! Yuck!

Have you started to show yet: A little bit! But not too much to anyone that does not know me. My family is starting to tell. I can most def tell. My little tum tum is hard!

Gender: We find out next week at 20 weeks!! I hope it is accurate. hahah I have heard horror stories of people finding out this early and being told it was a girl, but really a boy. Anyway…I am counting down the days…5 days away!! Oh, and the votes are 50/50 split with our families on guessing the gender. See below for the consensus:

Girl:

Me
Grandma Virginia
Tamara
Tammy
Mary
Carleigh
Jimmy
Jacqueline
Ramey
Megan
Jeni
Cambria
Erica

Boy:
Joe
Justin
Mom
Susie
Rick
Danny
Tom
Matt
Savannaha
Justin
Maggie
Jenna

Labor signs: None

Belly button in or out: In

Wedding rings on or off: On

Happy or moody most of the time: Happy 🙂

Looking forward to: Finding out the babies gender next Wednesday and Leaving for Vegas TO GET MARRIED THE SAME DAY!! Lot’s of exciting things next week!

19 week BUMP

19 week BUMP

Reiterates I was NOT in love with my ex. The mind can trick you.

When you get in to a relationship often times you can mistake being in “lust” for being in “love”. The reason, you’re focusing on what “could be” then what it really is. Also, I have noticed people will tend to be lustful or potentially fall in love with someone if they want to change the other person. News flash: that won’t work. I learned these lessons in my last relationship. Which made me realize I have only ever been in love ONCE. Is that sad? Will I ever fall for someone again? LOL